“You are not just a therapist. You are also someone’s daughter or son, partner, parent, and most of all, a human being who needs care too.”
In 2010 and 2011, I helped all the staff of Médecins Sans Frontières (MSF) in Kashmir cope with professional burnout. But I never truly learned how to manage my own—until I experienced it myself.
Burnout in mental health professionals is one of the most silent and dangerous syndromes in caregiving professions. We, as therapists, are trained to hold space for others, to listen deeply, to absorb pain, and to guide our clients toward light. But who holds space for us when we begin to dim? Who tends to our emotional fatigue when it becomes too much to carry?
After more than 20 years in clinical psychology, I can say with conviction that burnout is not a distant risk—it’s a recurring visitor that knocks on the door of every therapist’s mind and body. I’ve faced it personally: long hospital hours, back-to-back clients, no space for myself. It led to a breakdown, followed by depression and even medication. It even lead to fights in my relationship where I was not able to handle my self, emotions and expectations causing extreme burden on my partner. I hit a wall that forced me to confront an uncomfortable truth: I was great at teaching clients how to cope with stress—but terrible at following my own advice. What followed, though, was a profound rediscovery of self and a transformation of how I approached both my work and my life.
Since then, the last 15 years have been a journey of not just surviving, but redefining how I live, work, and care for myself. I want to share what helped me—not as a prescription, but as a compassionate offering to every therapist who has ever felt “too tired to help one more person.”
In this blog, I want to share what I’ve learned—not from textbooks, but from lived experience. If you’re a therapist feeling emotionally depleted, if your body is whispering (or screaming) that it needs rest, if the thought of showing up for clients feels like too much—you are not alone.
Here is a detailed guide to therapist self-care, specifically designed to address burnout and help you return to your center.
What Burnout Feels Like for Therapists
Unlike many other professions, therapy demands deep emotional labor. We hold space for trauma, grief, anxiety, broken relationships, identity crises—sometimes several times a day. The human brain does not distinguish between virtual experiences and reality; it processes and responds to both in a similar manner. As a result, repeated exposure to narratives of trauma, grief, anxiety, broken relationships, and identity crises—often multiple times a day—can lead to vicarious trauma. This phenomenon occurs when prolonged engagement with distressing content triggers neurobiological stress responses, impacting emotional well-being and cognitive functioning.
Burnout in therapists doesn’t always look like collapsing or quitting. It can be more subtle:
- Feeling emotionally numb after sessions.
- Dreading work even when your calendar is light.
- Snapping at loved ones over small things.
- Questioning your efficacy as a clinician.
- Feeling detached from your own sense of purpose.
When these signs persist, it’s time to pause.
And that pause isn’t indulgence. It’s essential maintenance.
A Therapist’s Self-Care Guide: What I’ve Learned
Let me walk you through the practices that helped me recover and prevent another breakdown. These are not just self-care tips—they’re a mindset shift.
1. Permission to Pause: You Are Allowed to Rest
Therapists often carry the unspoken belief that we must always be emotionally available, calm, and composed. But let me tell you something fundamental: it’s okay to not be okay.
Taking a mental health leave, saying “I need rest,” or postponing sessions is not a weakness—it’s a strength. It is a conscious choice to protect your inner world. Remember, your clients need a grounded version of you, not a depleted one. The therapeutic relationship is not sustained by martyrdom but by presence—and that comes from rest.
Let go of the guilt. Give yourself explicit permission to pause. Rest is not a luxury for therapists—it is a responsibility.
Reflection Prompt: When was the last time you gave yourself permission to stop?
“Taking a break isn’t weakness. It’s intelligent self-preservation.”
2. Daily Rituals of Nourishment: Healing in Small Doses
“You don’t need a vacation. You need a lifestyle you don’t need to escape from.”
During my recovery, I created small rituals that restored me. These weren’t grand wellness routines—just consistent, gentle acts:
- Ten minutes of silence or breathwork every morning. Just to feel my breath, my body, my presence.
- A walk in the morning, without devices. To reconnect with nature, with life.
- A hobby that doesn’t have a goal. For me, it was sometimes cooking, making pickles as I was from Andhra Pradesh and I love pickles, playing chess with my daughters, watching random movies with family. For you, it could be painting, gardening, cooking.
These rituals were sacred. They reminded me: I exist outside of my profession. You don’t need a grand vacation to reset. Start with micro-moments of joy and grounding. These daily rituals can slowly rebuild the inner reservoir you give from.
Ideas to Try:
- Journaling a gratitude list before bed
- Listening to instrumental music while closing your eyes
- Cooking something just for yourself, not for anyone else at times
Make this non-negotiable. Your nervous system needs these moments more than it needs productivity.
3. Boundaries Are Sacred: Learn to Say “No” with Love
“Boundaries are the bridge between compassion and burnout.”
Burnout thrives in the absence of boundaries. Many of us say yes to extra sessions, late-night crisis calls, and emotionally draining work, because we equate saying “no” with failing our clients. But here’s the truth: boundaries are not barriers to healing—they are the container in which true healing happens.
When I returned to therapy after my breakdown, I limited the number of high-emotion clients I saw per day. I created no-client days. I stopped checking messages after 8 p.m. These changes weren’t easy at first, but they saved me. Now my clients don’t call me or message me after 8 pm.
Therapists are givers. But overgiving leads to emotional bankruptcy. I learned to protect my energy:
Tips for Better Boundaries:
- Limit emotionally intense clients in one day. Three back-to-back trauma sessions will drain anyone.
- End sessions on time—even if it feels abrupt. You are not abandoning the client. You are respecting your own bandwidth.
- Don’t check messages or emails late at night. Your off-time is not a soft border.
- Schedule “buffer time” between sessions.
- Create a ritual to mentally “close” your workday (a walk, a shower, music).
Saying no to others is saying yes to yourself.
Your healing energy is finite. Use it wisely.
4. Supervision and Safe Venting: Therapists Need to Be Held Too
“Healers also need healing.”
Even therapists need a therapist. And we all need a space where we can cry, vent, and admit that we’re tired of carrying everyone else’s pain.
Supervision, peer therapy groups, and professional sharing circles can be immensely healing. They remind you that you’re not failing—you’re just human. Speaking your truth in a non-judgmental space can help prevent emotional buildup from turning into breakdown.
I used to think supervision was for young clinicians. I was wrong.
Now, I regularly consult—not just for clinical dilemmas, but for emotional decompression. Some sessions are purely for venting. Others are reflective. Either way, they remind me: I’m not alone.
Find your space to be raw. To say, “I’m overwhelmed,” without judgment. Peer support and supervision can act as emotional CPR when you’re running low on breath.
What to Seek:
- Monthly supervision with a trusted senior therapist
- A therapist of your own who understands the therapist’s dilemma
- Peer support WhatsApp or Telegram groups for emotional check-ins
5. Reconnect with Purpose Without Pressure — but Only When You’re Ready
One of the cruel tricks of burnout is that it disconnects you from your original purpose. The work that once lit you up now feels like a weight.
That’s okay.
You don’t need to force inspiration. Instead, gently remind yourself of why you chose this profession. Read a thank-you note from a past client. Revisit an old case where you witnessed transformation. Let purpose return in small waves, not pressure-filled expectations.
Don’t force meaning when you’re exhausted. Let it return softly.”
I stopped trying to “rekindle the spark.” I let myself just be. Over time, small moments brought it back—a client’s heartfelt thank you, a moment of laughter in session, a breakthrough. These moments gently reminded me: I do love this work. But I must love myself first.
Purpose isn’t something you chase. It comes back when you rest long enough to hear its whisper.
Journaling Prompt: What’s one moment in your career that made you feel proud to be a therapist?
6. Don’t Do This Alone: Therapists Also Need Therapy
“If you’re a therapist without a therapist, please reconsider.”
Therapists are natural givers. But giving constantly without receiving leads to emotional bankruptcy. You deserve to be supported.
Have a list of three people you can reach out to when you’re overwhelmed. Not to “fix” you, but to simply hold space. And if you feel isolated, remember: there are therapists everywhere going through the same thing. Find them. Create your circle.
Getting into therapy again was humbling. I thought, “I’ve been practicing for 20 years—I know the tools.”
But knowing is not the same as being held.
My therapist became a mirror. They helped me see my blind spots, my unspoken grief, my suppressed needs. Therapy became not just healing—it became my sanctuary.
There’s no shame in needing support. There’s only strength in seeking it.
Simple Practice: Text a fellow therapist today and ask, “Hey, how are you doing lately?”
7. Micro-Restorations: Little Things Keep the Engine Running
“You don’t need a week off. You need five minutes of kindness to yourself—daily.”
We often wait for holidays or sabbaticals to rest. But the nervous system doesn’t operate on quarterly calendars. It needs rest every day.
What’s one thing that helps you feel human again?
On the busiest days, even small self-care acts make a difference:
- A short nap
- A warm cup of tea without distraction.
- Lying down on the floor with your eyes closed
- Five minutes of music that lifts your mood.
- A short journaling session to unload emotional residue.
- These tiny resets are not indulgent—they’re necessary. Integrate at least one micro-restoration per day.
These micro-restorations are like charging your phone for 10 minutes when it’s about to die. They won’t fix everything—but they can carry you through the day without collapse.
Challenge: Pick one act of restoration and do it today, without guilt.
8. Long-Term Adjustments: It’s Okay to Change How You Practice
“You’re allowed to evolve.”
Sustained well-being sometimes requires structural change. If your current style of practice is burning you out, it may be time to redesign your work.
Some therapists I know have:
- Shifted to part-time work
- Offered only short-term therapy models
- Added creative work (writing, art, coaching) into their schedule
Your work can evolve with you. Burnout might be a sign that your professional identity is ready for an update.
After my burnout, I changed how I worked:
- I reduced my daily caseload.
- I switched to more psycho-educational work, including writing and entrepreneurship.
- I became selective about cases that were emotionally safe for me.
Ask Yourself:
- What kind of client work feels nourishing to me now?
- What work patterns are no longer sustainable?
- What else am I longing to express or create?
Therapy is a lifelong profession. You’re allowed to pivot.
Your practice should grow with you—not enslave you. What served you 10 years ago may not serve you today. That’s not failure. That’s evolution.
You Are Not Alone in This
If you’re reading this and resonating with any of it, let me tell you something I wish someone told me earlier:
You are not weak. You are human.
You are not just a therapist. You are also a daughter or son, a parent, a friend, a soul with needs, limits, and longings. You deserve rest. You deserve softness. You deserve to be cared for, too.
We don’t heal by pushing through.
We heal by pausing, feeling, and reconnecting—first with ourselves, then with the world.
Final Thoughts: Make Self-Care a System, Not a Crisis Response
Burnout doesn’t happen overnight. It creeps in. It whispers before it screams.
Don’t wait for collapse.
Start today by asking yourself:
- What do I need more of in my week?
- What do I need to do less of?
- Who can I talk to without wearing the therapist mask?
Remember:
Your healing is the foundation of your work.
Take care of it. Fiercely. Gently. Daily.
With warmth and solidarity,
John Victor
Clinical Psychologist | Father | Healer Who Once Needed Healing Too
If you’ve made it this far, know that you’re not alone. If you ever need support, please don’t hesitate to reach out. I’m here for you.
